Greetings Tweeps!

I’m gonna try and write this blog, but it may take awhile since I’m very into this Rangers-Capitals game right now. Don’t worry, I hate both teams, but unlike most of the Philadelphia population, I want the Rangers in the conference finals. I have too many friends from the Stagdome days that are Rangers fans, and I could use a break from their friendship for a week or two. L-O-L Pete… L-O-L. Anyways, its hard to think of blogging topics these days, what with my extensive softball/baseball schedule and all. But I finally thought of one the other day at work. I was taking my daily 5-20 minute break (depending on what was for lunch that day) and something hit me. Back in the day when I would “retire” to the male sanctuary, I would likely enjoy a nice game of Brickbreaker, check the ole facebook page, or maybe some Angry Birds (I discovered this like 2 years after the rest of the world. Great game). If I hit up Chipotle that day, I’d usually have enough time to get through an entire Bill Simmons article. In case there’s actually a female reading this, his articles are like A MILLION PAGES. But I noticed this time that I had spent the whole time just cruising around the world that is Twitter. And that’s when I fully realized that for multiple reasons, I like Twitter SOO MUCH MORE than Facebook.

Now I was once one of those guys who said that Twitter was stupid. Seriously, why did I need it??? All my friends were on facebook and the only athletes I thought were on it were NBA players. Then I started hanging out with a certain female who swore by it. Constantly on the damn thing, and I just did not get it. Long story short, she convinced me to sign up for it and started the intense coaching process. “What the hell is this number sign thingy?” id ask. “That’s how you categorize what your talking about.” Ooooook….whatever that means. I didn’t touch the thing for like 3 weeks. I started to fiddle with it a bit and started to notice that a lot of my favorite athletes were on it, as well as musicians. Naturally I started following Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. One day he tweeted that he was raising money for a music school he founded, and the next 20 people who went to his website and donated $20 would received a signed tshirt from him. Being the pepper-nut I am, I swiftly logged on, threw 20 bones his way, and hoped to hear back. Sure enough, an hour later I had an email in my inbox thanking me for my donation and informing me that I would be receiving a tshirt. I was pretty pumped, but not sold yet. What are the odds that id actually get the shirt. Well, turns out they were good, cuz 2 weeks later I had this…

I also used Twitter to communicate with my favorite “new” band, Steel Panther. Prior to seeing them live in Philly one night, I tweeted a rather amusing line to the drummer and guitar player. With the help of my trusty comrade Ian (he literally ate a beer can after the show, prompting the support band to give us backstage passes) we found ourselves backstage after the concert. We started talking to Stixx (the drummer of Steel Panther) and I said that I was the guy who tweeted him that joke. He said that they loved it and we ended up slugging BLs with them after the show. Can facebook do that??? The answer is no. I think the fact that Ian is a veteran helped our cause, but whatever, we partied!!

I did pull a major violation on my 25th bday though. I asked Duff McKagan of Guns n Roses for a happy bday tweet. I’m not proud of this, but he responded, so yeah, I am kinda proud of it. #getonmylevel I also received one of the treasured “Direct Messages” from Chad Smith, drummer from the Chili Peppers, last weekend. After I asked him why they never play anything from their first 4 albums, he politely informed me that they were playing 2 in every set. Apologies Chad. My B. Must give credit where credit is due. @trrubeey, thank you!!! Another reason Twitter crushes Zuckerberger’s creation is the limit on characters you can tweet. At first, I thought it was annoying that I could only type out a sentence or two. As evident by this blog, I’ve got WAAAAYYYY too much wisdom to dish out. But I have now come to appreciate this bylaw. Why?? Have you read any of the posts from the annoying chicks you are still friends with bc you’re afraid if you de-friend them they will put a dead bird on ur porch??? Guys, permission to speak freely and for all of you… Girls, we don’t give a shit about the healthy meal you ate today bc your trying to lose weight. So don’t post a picture of it. We don’t care. O, and guess what?? Losing 5 pounds isn’t hard. Please do let me know when you finally get the scratch for the boob job tho. Thanks! We also could care less about the mean person at your work who made you sad. In fact, we’d probably buy them a beer if we could. We also don’t care about how tough your class schedule is this semester. You’re 26. If your not in law school or studying to become a doctor, just f*ckin graduate already!!! Perhaps the best reason Twitter wins is for sports knowledge. Before ESPN started punishing their reporters for tweeting big stories before they broke (Stanman, WTF???) I knew everything before my friends did. It also gave us great entertainment when Jayson Stark would tweet MLB trivia questions. Instead of doing our jobs, we would be trying to figure out who the only player to win 4 batting titles was. Sorry ex-bosses, but me, Tierney and Temp rarely did work on Tuesdays from 9am-11am. It’s also great to follow your favorite radio personalities, like Preston n Steve and the crew from 97.5 the Fanatic. Seriously, if you still listen to WIP, you’re either old or dumb…or both. There is one thing that Facebook beats Twitter out on… Spring Break photos. Don’t judge, I never had a spring break. My spring break consisted of being cooped up with the baseball team in florida where we weren’t allowed to leave our hotel… or so our coaches thought. If your ever in Bradenton, I highly recommend the Paper Moon. Gotta love the spring break pics tho. Prolly the only reason I still have a fbook account.

That and promoting some Piping Hot D of course! Speaking of which, we hope to see all the Dbags and D-Vaas next week at the Manayunk Brew Pub on May 12!!!